+Invictus 2009
January 4th, 2010
Invictus, the story of Nelson Mandela post 1994
Invictus is already showing in South-Africa and I went to watch it. It’s only being released in the UK on the 5th of February, just in time to keep the memory of the film fresh in the minds of those who bought tickets for the 2010 Football Wold Cup hosted in South Africa. (Throughout the local SA media they are urging locals to buy tickets for matches so if you have’nt got one yet, now’s your chance)
Before I tell you what I thought of the film, let me make one thing very clear,
I am not a patriot, in fact, it has been said that I paint a grim picture of the place I was born in. I am so strong in some of my opinions that I chose pay the price of being an immigrant for the rest of my life and have paid a lot of money, personal onslaughts from family and friends just to stay out of South-Africa. That said, I liked the film.
Briefly, the film is about President Nelson Mandela and the turmoil which followed the 1994 elections with emphasis placed on the massive influence rugby had on uniting a nation hell bent on killing each other.
It’s a pity that they had to use American actors for the leading roles. Sure, Morgan Freeman who plays the President slips on the accent but after hearing Leonardo Di Caprio’s accent in Blood Diamond, I’ll forgive him for it. Besides, Morgan Freeman is so synonymous with jail thanks to Shawshank redemption that the viewer can convincingly imagine him suffering and sticking it out in prison.
Matt Damon plays Franscious Pienaar, the Springbok South-African rugby captain who tries to help the President with his vision of not only winning the 1995 rugby world cup, but also to nudge the black population of the country to shed their hunger for vengeance and forgive their previous white oppressors.
I couldn’t help but relive some of the moments they portray in the film, it’s very convincing and true to events, even though I was only 13 at the time these events took place. It was great to see some old SA actors and hear the music of Johnny Clegg, one of my favourite SA musicians. There’s even some footage of the Soweto String Quartet performing!
There are loads of emotions you are forced to deal with whilst watching this film and sometimes you have to remind yourself that the stuff you see actually happened. If I’m honest, I’d say the final match in the film was more exciting and memorable.
The only downer on the film is a personal one because I hate to see what was envisioned by Mandela and how it actually panned out. The current state of South-Africa today is a violent, corrupt and uncertain one, not just for the whites and I somehow feel like we have all let Madiba down. Sadly, I also don’t think it’s a popular film amongst many South-Africans.
If you ever wondered why Saffas ( expat for South-Africans ) love rugby, watch this film or, better yet, if you are the current President of South-Africa, watch this film to try and understand the vision Madiba had for SA. Now I can’t help but wonder if Football would’ve united this nation like Rugby did back in 1995.
Tags: afrikaner, appartheid, elections, Football 2010, invictus 2009, invictus film review, Jaluka, Johnny Clegg, madiba, Matt Damon, Morgan Freeman, Nelson Mandela, politics, racism, robben island, shawshank redemption, Soccer, Soweto String Quartet, Wolrld Cup
Posted in South-Africa 2010 | No Comments »
+I will Fly
December 15th, 2009
Tomorrow I will fly from foOninjas on Vimeo.
And here I thought I wouldn’t get to ride on Camber before I had to leave 
Jim had the good sense to suggest a trip to Camber last Saturday and the kindness to suffer my verbal onslaught during the free ride he offered me and Karl. It was bloody brilliant. We had the “ratatata tata tata” sound of gunfire from the neighbouring army base echoing in the air, a photo crew snapping away at a scantily clad and later (to the delight of all) a naked model posing on the pebble dunes and mince pies to round the day off. No I lie, we went for an ale and discarded hamburger cheese at one of the pubs afterwards.
Footage of us kiting is scarce, more so if the wind is good because we are by heart kiters, not cinematographers. I think the camera shake in this film is mostly balmed on adrenaline and anticipation. Jim and Karl skinned themselves from their gear to take some clips with me and when the wind picked up, nobody even gave a damn about their gear.
To remedy our filming issue, we hope to employ the nekkid chick to film our skills when the wind picks up on future trips.
Anyway, here’s a little slapstick video made for the park boys to drool over when we need a sandy fix.
Tags: Camber Sands, Flexifoil Atom, Flexifoil Blade V 4m, Peter Lynn Phantom 12, Peter Lynn Venom 13, trampa
Posted in Kiting | 1 Comment »
+Chris Letcher
December 11th, 2009
Listen to this:
The guy is just fantastic.I know nothing about him other than he used to live in SA, that he was in a band with Matthew van der Want and that we look like we could have been brothers. His music grows on you even the songs you think you don’t like initially you will soon love when you find something in the lyrics and movements that you can clothe yourself with. I saw them perform “Special Agents” back in 1998 at Oppikoppi but for some reason only started looking for their music 2 years ago. I contacted Chris via his website and he sent me 2 discs with a note to pay him what ever I wanted to. Like I mentioned, I don’t know a lot about him, but I don’t have to, gestures like that speak volumes.
He regularly gigs in North London and I was fortunate to meet him briefly after one such gig in Camden a couple of years back. I talked a lot of shit, the kind of shit I talk when I’ve rehearsed what I’m going to say for weeks just on the off chance that I’d speak to him. Ha!
Thump also loves his band and just the other day commented that Chris deserves to be stinkingly rich. Hell, I remember hard rock band members who were also giging there walk up to applaud him.
Listen to more samples on his website: Letcher Music
Deep Frieze – Chris Letcher from Chris Letcher on Vimeo.
An ass kicking live version:
Posted in Am I the only one? | 1 Comment »
+“the soft touch”
December 7th, 2009
This is why I like old people.
They have experienced things I am completely ignorant and oblivious too.
“your mind is your greatest enemy” <– that there is platinum advice you can not buy with money.
Not only can Ray fly multiple kites but he has seen more coochie that I have too ( he used to be a gynaecologist )
Legend in every sense of the word.
When we had beers last Saturday after the day’s kite flying in Gunnersbury Park, I remember there was a point when I became drunk and caught something Leo said about some guy in our park flying stunt kites. Initially he thought the guy was a spastic, but later he realised the motivation behind the madness. I then remembered Ray’s video which I saw for the first time on a racekites.com forum thread and tried to explain that Ray does something like 7 kites at once!
Like I said, I was drunk and even though I’ve since said sorry for an uncustomary exaggeration, I’m still impressed by this guy.
Tags: hero, old people are awesome, ray bethell, stunt kites
Posted in Kiting | No Comments »
+SA after 3 and a half years
December 1st, 2009
looking forward to it YARRR!
If I didn’t move to the UK in 2004, I’d probably be dead and divorced by now.
When my skinny feet hit London Heathrow that day in June my life expectancy increased into something I could only describe as tangible inside me, even though I was hung over from the 3 stumpy Stella Artois that didn’t mix with my low blood pressure during the flight. Fast forward 5 years, 6 months and bet your ass, it feels like I’ve come to within an inch of running on empty.
Having to go back to South-Africa is like suspecting you have Colon cancer. You know it’s only a matter of time, but you don’t know what to expect and crying over it won’t help so although I have nothing to return to, nor anything to look forward to, I’m going to get the fuck up, and try to rebuild my life over there. Unless my plan and the efforts of many work and we make it back to the UK somewhere in the spring of 2010
While I’m there, I figure I’ll document my debriefing from a 1st to 3rd world developing country and take you on a virtual tour of my valley. I pan on taking pictures of the things people don’t get to see about SA, I plan to write about things the media can’t be bothered to publish because Katie Price left her cross dressing boyfriend and that sells better than the everyday horrors normal families have to live through. You can trust me when I say, I will go out of my way to find the good things about South-Africa too.
Wish me luck.
ps. Happy birthday DAD!
Tags: 2010, expat, Heathrow, immigrate, Julius Malema, Katie Price, resession, South-Africa 2010, stella
Posted in South-Africa 2010 | 2 Comments »
+Why women like vampires
October 19th, 2009
how Twilight should have ended
It was by accident that I got my wife the film Twilight.
I figured, it was some romcom but it turned out to be a 6 month obsession for her and I blame vampires with their shitty emo idea of love for polluting the minds of our women.
You would think that Buffy, Blade and Underworld sucked the vampire inspired genre to the brink of extinction but I was wrong. When Twilight came out it was an instant hit with the bitches, and I think I know why. First they cast some plain Jane with a dude that looks like the love child of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Then they make him a “good” vampire, one who sucks on defenceless animals and turns into diamonds when he is in sunlight. Fuck. I suppose Stephanie Meyers had to think of something to justify them not bursting into flames the moment they hit sunlight. Unfortunately, the shit doesn’t stop with Twilight or any of the sequels that will follow.
Recently I had the discomfort of being forced to spend quality time by watching Vampire diaries.
It’s essentially the same crap ie. Vampire dude goes to school and is attracted to a sad girl who isn’t scared of him. He can also walk in the sun because of some ring. His brother hates him because these vampires are very much in touch with their feelings and he stole his brother’s girlfriend or killed her or something a long those lines, I forgot to care.
I think our women like vampires because they want drones who are so damn out of touch with life that they seem broken only to be fixed by them. They also like them because they are not real, if they were, they wouldn’t be so damn soppy and in love all the time. My biggest theory behind why women like the undead sucking bastards is because of their sense of style and the promise of eternal life. Actually, I don’t care and none of it makes any sense. Perhaps it has something to do with menstruation or something.
Regardless, vampires it seems, are very hot right now.
To compensate for the melo drama they spurn out for women, HBO started screening True Blood. If Twilight is for women, I suppose True Blood was made for a larger male audience with masses of nudity, bad and blatant over acting coupled with shit loads of swearing and gore. The only good thing about True Blood is not Sookie’s mamerries (which they won’t show you unless you are hooked and well past episode 2 of the 2nd series ) but a gay black bartender dude called Lafayette who is an awesomely interesting character. The 17 year old eternal virgin red head helps a little too if I’m honest. Unfortunately, the same old “how to make a Vampire movie or (series) for Dummies” crap applies too. We also have a girl who seem oblivious to vampire influences, who falls likewise for a vampire and whom you wish would just get sucked, fucked, killed and share a coffin with her shit choice in male companion for all eternity. Let me stop here before I get on to the insanity which is Underworld.
I don’t think Werewolves will be the next big thing because they are too hairy and if there is one thing women hate, it’s body hair.
Tags: Bill, Sookie, Stephanie Meyer, True Blood, Twilight, Underworld, Vampire Diaries, Werewolves
Posted in Am I the only one? | No Comments »
+why we do the things we do
October 6th, 2009
“Don’t listen to the pussy side of you when you make a decision.
People gravitate towards being a pussy. Remove the pussy, son.”
That qoute from shitmydadsays could be interpreted as:
Stop being a big fat scardy cat. Man-up, take the risk, stop being such a friggin girl.
I saw it as: remove the ultimate goal of getting laid when making a decision or doing stupid things in order to be more appealing to the fairer sex.
Why the hell would I construe something so obvious?
Perhaps it’s because I see it every day. Men do the smallest most stupid things that aren’t noticed by women to get them laid. It’s pathetic and yet, I am guilty as sin.
At work I see it all the time too. Screw what they say about equality. Men treat female co-workers in a special way, just to better their chances of entry. I’d go so far as to say every thing a man does is powered by the need to get more punani.
I’m not talking about splashing aftershave, sweating our balls off in the gym, or working our asses off to own sport cars. No, I’m talking about the little things we do without even realising we do them. Even if we are hitched, we still do it.
Almost causing an accident to allow the hottie in her polo fox the space in front of you, changing the tone of our voice when we talk to the HR lady, offering the chair up in the lunch room, faking concern when we are sizing them up or worse, belittling a mate with a sarcastic comment to show how obviously mentally superior we are.
I’ve seen men do some silly shit due to the presence of women. Take a year ago at a company party as an example. There was this girl who drank too much and started to puke. There were 3 other guys who puked violently too but as it would turn out, the woman had 2 blokes creating a human barrier for her whilst she slept after her puking episode on the floor in the hopes that when she gets sober, somebody would vouch for their valiant attempts…….to get laid…….. The other 3 puking dudes, were fine too although their chances for getting laid remained the same.
What’s the point? All men are players. We can’t help it. Our motives are screwed thanks to everything we pass through our sex filter and we’ll change ourselves, the things we do and how we do them normally in order to get laid. Even with our spouses.
My question is this:
What would the world be like if men were to cut pussy’s out of the equation when making decisions?
Tags: feminist, free line skates, freelines, men are easy, player, punani, sex filter, twitter
Posted in Say what?!? | No Comments »
+yeah bwoyee
August 6th, 2009
It doesn’t feel like the people I live with appreciate what it takes to do a 360.
They are all so oblivious one would swear they get to witness front flip nose grabs before they have their first morning cuppa.
Anyway, my grandfather George, turned 89 on Tuesday the 4th of August and although I didn’t call him, I celebrated by landing my first 360 airborne rotations. Because I planned to do it, because I believed that I will do it on that day after a whole Saturday of falling on my hip leaving what looked like a blue purpelly love bite made by an adolescent vampire pig, I brought my wife a long to take some pictures.
What’s the big deal? I hear you say all sarcastically, well STFU! ok! doing a 360 takes some big fear repressing and if you can’t do it everybody laughs at you because they know your left testicle is slightly lower than your right one and it makes you rotate a bit slower. It’s even worse when they all know this is a goal of yours and your friend manages to land his before you do. Doing a full blown un-adulterated 360 means that you are not embarrassed when the people you work with ask you why you are making rappid left spins whilst putting the milk back in the fridge.
One other thing that annoys me is that I’ve managed to suck at kiting for so long that nobody watches when I do something anymore, so when I do something out of the suckage ordinary, people like my favourite kiting buddy for the past couple of years will whoop or say something like YEAH bwoyee which makes you look around just to be damn sure that proud tear in your eye is justified.
Since, I’ve managed to send unreplied e-mails to everybody (6) I know and everybody I work with are now so friggin sick of me shoving my skills down their throughts that they automatically respond with “WOW” when they see me walking up to them with my green memory stick of awesome proof pictures. Damn right the land lubbing bitches should recognise!
Tags: arc, custom trampa board, Fabrizio, kite, kite board, kite board tricks, landboarding, London kite flying, London kite park, peter lynn venom 16m, peter lynn venom II, trampa
Posted in Kiting | 2 Comments »
+there's nothing wrong with Esther
August 6th, 2009
why so serious?
I don’t care what some reviews say about the film “the Orphan”, on how the makers forgot where they were going with it, I liked it.
It was delisciously evil and I honestly rooted for the girl whilst having the odd giggle as she manipulated her way out of brutal situations. I knew something was up when she had more mature insights than the entire cast of Dawson’s Creek but I couldn’t put it together untill the end was given towards the very very end. I’m not going to spoil it for you, but if I had to give you my take on the film it was about folks who are too impulsive, too broody over past issues and if some of them had gotten laid more, things might have been peacefull. Ester was, to my wife’s utter horror when I made the revelation, the ultimate pedo, no jail time dream.
Tags: horror, new release, pshycosis, the orphan
Posted in Say what?!? | No Comments »
+Sundae is common
July 27th, 2009
my Ben & Jerry's festival ticket
I love Ben & Jerry’s, not just the Ice cream variants rich in large ingredients and flavour, but also what the brand represents. I think they have the right idea when it comes to giving something back. Who cares if they use a running water mill to help protect us from swine flue?( That kid in Africa only needs £2 a year to waste as much as he wants right? )
They also have a number of events through-out the world, one of which was held this weekend in London on Clapham common with all kinds of young girls in whispy spring dresses.
Being the second time I went to the festival I had some expectation since the first time I went, we got to see Florence and the machine when she was still unsigned and we had our fill of Free Ice cream. This year, I was full of expectation with bands such as Super Fury Animals, Teenage Fanclub, Marina and the diamonds, I am Kloot, Tommy Reilly playing and rumour that we will get to taste the American only Ice Cream variant “Yes Pecan”. For some reason, my expectations were too high this year.
The festival organisers are in my opinion Nazi bred bastards with a knack of forcing people to spend dosh.
I’m not talking about the Auswitch perimeter they have set up around the festival, patrolled by fierce lookin guards around the minute, no, I’m talking about their stupid “no own food and drink rule”
Fine, there were 2 bar tents this year, but damnit, I don’t care if you shit money bags for a living, I refuse to pay £3.70 for a 330ml Budweiser when last year, I could get a can of Carlsberg for less ( But I had to wait for 90mins in a que to get that beer ).
I suspect other people felt the same way since the liquor queues were short this year but the queues for the free icecreams were insanely long where my friends were queuing for 30mins to get their scoop fix.
The food was also priced at premium and I was expected to pay £5 for a bland roll with some meat on but if you want to go to the hippie yuppie retro fashion victim festival you are not affected by the credit crunch and should stfu since nobody likes a tight arse.
The credit crunch did however affect the festival. Same airguitar guys ( who seriously need to get their hands on a Guitar hero controller ), less rides for the kiddies, less freebies than last year and the same annoying midget on stilts who seems to be around every corner jerking his rubber chicken. Yes, really. I’m pretty sure The Toe wrestler whore the same pink mankini than last yea too.
I liked the festival though, it was warm yet breezy, there were pretty lookin folk about and the bands were damn awesome, it is also one of the few festivals where kids are on a constant sugar high running from one queuing parent to the next.
If I decide to go next year, I’ll think of ways to fuck their ” no food and drink rule ” over for damn sure.
Tags: ben & jerry's festival, florence and the machine., marina and the diamonds, sundae on the common, super furry animals
Posted in Say what?!? | No Comments »